My prayers ("Are you there, job? It's me, L-Rap!") are finally answered

For as much as I like to make fun of people/my friends for actually having jobs, it's all in good fun/Regina George Mean Girls behavior. IT'S BECAUSE I'M JEALOUS! I know people think "work sucks," but guess what - I LOVE to work, and as much as I did enjoy having a little break from it at the beginning of my hiatus, I really don't want to be unemployed. I'll gladly trade my couch for a cubicle, my granola bars and free bagels that were just going to be thrown out for actual foods - my sweatpants for REAL pants!
Well, greenlighters, the time has come for your beloved L-Rap to claw her way out of the working class with her real j.o.b. (that starts tomorrow - AH!) If you've been listening to me bitch, moan, and cry  following the saga of the whole interview process that I've been through and/or noticed that I've been living in a cave the past 5 weeks, I first apologize for being a gloomy gal, second thank you for your unwavering love and support that got me through this time, and third invite you out for drinks and dancing to celebrate my entrance into the working world and say good bye to my slaveage to minimum wageage!

And just for funtimes, let's take a look at a rundown of my work history:
Putt-Putt Miniature Golf Course (later renamed Putter's Paradise): Summers '01, '02, '03 - pay: $6.15/hour, benefits: all the Smartie's and Choco Taco's you can eat and free games for your friends
American Eagle Outiftters: short-lived summer job in 2002 - pay: $5.40/hour, benefits: 40-60% discount, ability to add "excellent t-shirt folding skills" to resume
Journey's: the minute I turned 16 until I left for college (2002-2004) - pay: I totally forget I just remember that I got laid off for a short period and then rehired for a higher rate...probably $6.50 then $7/hour, benefits: 35% off, special 50%, also ability to survive in any working environment that included: sexual harassment, working the storefront while different managers hung out in the backroom committing statuatory rape, stealing shoes, smoking pot, taking pregnancy tests, gambling, napping, fighting/throwing shoeboxes at significant others, cheating on fiancée, pooping in a box to send to another store.
Gadzook's: Summers '02, later in '04 to help them liquidate while the company went bankrupt. pay: ?? prob around $7/hour, benefits: a discount, becoming well accquainted with the Playboy line of clothing and accessories and the people that purchase said items
Pastino's (later renamed Rosario's, now closed): Summers '04, '05 - pay: $3.30/hour + tips, benefits: really good free food
NYU Phonathon: first few months of freshman year, pay: who cares, it was the WORST JOB EVER with no benefits except getting the chance to harass dying NYU alum
Media 4 Humanity: 2004 - 2005 - pay: internship, so just warm fuzzy feelings for doing good, benefits: two personal assisting jobs each $10/hour
Oren's Daily Roast: 2004 - 2007 - pay: $8-11/hour + tips, benefits: Nothing to snark about, really, truly the love of my service industry life! Made some of my best friends here and became a serious coffee snob from working here...
Dogsitting: 2005 - present - pay: good, benefits: getting to know dogs like Chester and Austin-pants
Interview: 2006 - pay: internship, benefits: free mags, indie cred, and paid freelance transciption work
Brooklyn Bread: 2009 - pay: $6.50/hour + tips, benefits: bagels, ability to master paying rent, utilities, and loans each month on less than $800 gross income
Assorted real jobs: Ryan Basic's & Sexy Beast, Entertainment Weekly/EW.com, Shecky's, lots of freelance writing

Comments

[chantal]

congrats lisa!! Keep me in my mind when they have a position open!!

[wahoo!]

APRIL FOOLS!
no really, thank god

[Blair]

Congrats!!!! I'm so jealous! Still hunkered down in my little unemployment cave over here.

But! Now I can say that I know at least ONE fellow journalism student from NYU who has a real, bonified job! You give the rest of us hope. ;)

[Annie]

JUST FUCKING FATE IS ALL, NO BIG DEAL. This is our ticket into the pants of many DELICIOUS men. And by "our", I really mean, my ticket in via you - One day I can be your real full-time exec assistant and also do all of your accounting. And you can sneak me your drinks when you rendezvous with all of my future husbands, which I am counting on there being many of. XOXO, Gossip Girl.

[Annie]

PS Your work history is about to get a major fucking face lift - as you are worth more than your weight in gold as an employee and those wages make me fucking angry. As angry as looking as a beautiful man.

[JCP]

omg I loove Orens! :) :)